Thursday, April 27, 2017

5 Signs It's Time To Leave Your Job

  1. You're stressed out over something you're not passionate about.
  2. You're tired of doing the same thing over and over again.
  3. You don't want to get out of bed and go to work.
  4. You start disagreeing with your bosses.
  5. You've done all you can with the company.

Sunday, April 23, 2017

How I Became Anti-Social or Asocial To Be Grammatically Correct

Disclaimer: I’m mainly talking about my school friends. Some of these statements don’t apply to Vietnamese friends I had, whose parents my parents knew.

It’s innate (I am an introvert) and learned.

My mom never invited anyone over besides family. As a result, I’ve rarely had friends come over to my apartments, and the ones that have come over kind of invited themselves—which is how you’ll ever see my place because my best friends from college haven’t even seen my apartment. It’s not that they’re not invited. I just don’t invite people over. It’s just a thing I never picked up. I was never socialized to invite people over, and it’s never been an issue. I’ve never changed because I’ve never needed it: I was fine growing up without having friends over.

In contrast, my roommate invites people over because that’s what her parents did.

In addition to never having people over growing up, I also never went to a friend’s house unless I was invited over for a birthday party or group project—never could I invite myself over.

As a result, growing up and even now, all of my friends have solely existed at school.

My daily schedule was wake up, go to school, come home, do homework, sleep, rinse, and repeat on weekdays and hang out with my parents and family on weekends.

In high school, I had a friend who tried to help me become less shy. I asked her to help me talk to people. She said all you have to do is say, “’Hi!’ It’s not that hard,” but now as an adult, I realize the reason I didn't talk to people is because I didn’t want to!

In college, all that changed. I was forced to become social. There were planned social events called icebreakers where you were forced to talk to get to know people. These were great for shy people. I actually loved icebreakers because I love talking when it’s about myself. I also realized that Asians can either be really cold or really warm. If you put a bunch of Asian strangers in a room, no one will approach each other, but if you put a bunch of Asian strangers in a room and call it an icebreaker, people will talk. As an upperclassmen in the Vietnamese Student Association, it was my duty to welcome new students in, so I was forced to be warm and sociable and extroverted. My friends were always around me because there were always events where everybody was invited. I also lived with them, so that helped a lot. Having a meal plan first year really helped too because it was easy to invite people to eat with you. Everyone had a meal plan. Having a meal plan was social in nature. My social circle shrunk when I deactivated my meal plan, but I guess I made more meaningful connections with the people I did hang out from that moment on.

After college, all that changed. I reverted back to my old anti-social self. I realized that I actually like enjoy spending time by myself. I don’t mind it, but when I miss people, I don’t know what to do.

For example, after graduation, one of my best friends from college and I thought distance would be the only thing that would separate us! Wrong! When I moved to Richmond, we were only ~two hours away as opposed to five hours apart in SOVA and NOVA. Yet, I didn’t see her once. Then, when I moved to NOVA, we were only 30 minutes apart, but we’ve only seen each other three times in NOVA in a year and a half. The only other times we’ve seen each other is back at UVA AKA BACK AT SCHOOL. Time has made us grown apart, and I want to reconnect but because of my innate and learned asocialness, I haven’t initiated anything because I’m afraid we won’t have anything to talk about anymore because that’s what it was like when we did meet up—albeit it was in a group situation and not one-on-one where I excel.

My mom also yells at my dad whenever he seeks out social interaction. This was and still is a form of positive punishment for me! She always yells at sister, dad, and me whenever we want to be social! (Although, she has good reason to yell at him).

As a result, socializing is a lot of work for me, and I can’t multitask. I was only able to make plans with friends after I quit my job. All my time and effort before were also put into a boy, who unfortunately invested no time and effort into me, but that’s beside the point.

Thankfully, instant messaging apps have allowed me to stay in touch with friends outside of school. I can socialize in the comforts of my own home without having to invite anyone over.

I also reconnected with my friend. All I had to do was finally get over said boy, quit my job, and tell her over Facebook Messenger everything I’ve been hiding from her in the past year LOL

Saturday, April 22, 2017

The One Scene No One Is Talking About in Boyhood

Note: I haven't done a scene analysis in two years so I'm a little rusty. 

There’s a scene in Boyhood when the protagonist, Mason, is a teen and hanging out with a couple of kids from school in addition to some older boys, who provide them with alcohol. The topic of sex comes up, and it’s not a conversation about how to have fun, safe, and most importantly, consensual sex; it’s a conversation about how many girls they’ve “fucked.” It’s extremely degrading to women, yet no one is talking about it because it’s considered normal: “boys will be boys,” but this isn’t normal and shouldn’t be normal.

I felt so uncomfortable watching this scene because I’ve seen this kind of conversation among adult men (not that this makes it any better) in movies but never among eighth graders. Boys should have better examples of how to treat women, but in this scene, the message is to be man you have to sleep with a woman: “Man, if you’re too chicken shit to even have a beer, I know for a fact that you have never gotten any pussy.” This was after one of the kids, Tony, was ironically called a pussy for not accepting said beer. You’re not a chicken for not attempting to have sex with a girl: you’re a gentleman who respects women. After Tony admits to being a virgin, the rest of the boys proceed to brag about losing their virginity and making girls “howl into the night[.]” Nowhere is the girl’s feelings considered in this exchange.

Understandably, the movie is called Boyhood and told mainly through Mason’s point of view, but no one boy can navigate through life without the influence of a woman: women are just as important as men and should not be relegated to an object of sexual conquest on a man’s path to masculinity.

It doesn't matter if the boys were lying about their sexual experiences. The conversation still happened: they still had to say they had sex in order to appear "cool."

[Candid] Super Bowl LI Reaction

End of the first quarter, we haven’t scored yet, but they haven’t either. We’ve stopped the #1 offense in the league. All right, this is going to be a defensive game.

Damn Atlanta’s running game is good. So is Julio Jones.

We’re going to score. Jk why Blount why?

Okay this is the drive we score on. 3 straight holding calls on the Falcons. Jk Why Brady Why?

It’s over.

Screen to big TE Bennett with less than 10 seconds left in the half? Really?! Couldn’t even score a touchdown before the end of the half. It’s over. Atlanta is getting the ball first in the second half, and they’re going to score and extend the lead to 28. Horrible play call #1

Lady Gaga's halftime performance > times infinity than the Patriots' first half performance

Okay Atlanta didn’t score. That’s good. But we didn’t either. Sigh time’s running out. Just fucking catch the balls—incomplete pass #1

4th down & 3 big play #1

Brady running the ball for 15 yards big play #2 what he should have been doing this whole time. Arguably had the best success running the ball for the Patriots all game

Stephen Gostkowski missed the freaking extra point—hope is not present yet

“There’s only 15 minutes left.”

Just a field goal—hope still not present because this field goal is not a gimme since he just missed an extra point from the same distance


We have to make this two-point conversion though.

How is Freeman so open?

Julio Jones again. Losing hope again, not really—just in disbelief

Yass incomplete pass

We just need a touchdown, praying there are no fumbles or interceptions i.e. turnovers

Hogan incomplete pass #2

That third and 10 conversion near the goal line though

Edelman catch, David Tyree helmet catch, crazy catch last Super bowl, Malcolm Butler interception

I’m just in disbelief at this point but still not believing we’re going to win because we still need to convert the two-point conversion

Was he across the line?

Atlanta still has time to score


Stanford band?!

If only we had Aaron Rodgers.

[The rest is history]

Win the coin toss omfg all we need to do is score a touchdown and we win

Praying we don’t turn the ball over

We finally stopped trying to run the ball

2 straight close plays

Pass interference makes it so much easier

Is he across the line? He’s in he’s in!



Watching the highlights—I’m still in disbelief

Missed the Matt Ryan handshake live

All Asian Guys Look Alike: My Love Letter to Kelvin Yu

All Asian guys look alike. I can say this because I’m Asian, and because I’m talking about the existence of attractive Asian guys (I'm looking at you, Steve Harvey). I was rewatching Master of None the other day, and once again I had the hots for Brian, Aziz Ansari’s character’s friend. I’ve found Kelvin Yu, the actor who plays Brian, very attractive since I first laid eyes on him, but I kind of forgot about him for real life crushes. When I saw him again, I was like holy shit he looks exactly like my ex. No wonder I couldn’t get over him: he looks like a famous person!!!!

I also realized while dating my ex that he kind of looks like one of my college friends, which was kind of awkward and hilarious at the same time because I along with some of my other friends signed a contract with this friend saying that if we were single in 15 years, one of us would marry him, but in reality none of us have seriously thought about dating him because he used to date someone in our peer group.

I was a little creeped out, but I came to realize that it makes a lot of sense actually because Kelvin Yu, my ex, and friend are all Taiwanese. I don’t have time to give you a history lesson, but modern day Taiwan is less than a hundred years old, and the gene pool there is really small. As a result, my ex is the exact replica of his father, who I stalked on the Internet, and the boyfriend of another girl I went to college with. I’m reminded of his little arrogant smirk every time this girl posts a picture of her boyfriend on Instagram. And once in a while when I’m swiping through Asian guys on dating apps, I’ll find someone who reminds me of another guy I’ve seen before—even if they’re not Taiwanese. I can’t explain this phenomenon for non-Taiwanese guys (maybe for survival reasons, we look for similarities in new faces), but it’s very obvious I have a type.

P.S. Kelvin Yu is actually a lot better looking, socially aware, creative, and a lot older, so probably a lot more mature, than my ex. This is actually a love letter to him. Please marry me, Kelvin Yu.

Edit: All boys look alike: I just saw similarities between a Taiwanese guy and a Bolivian guy.

To All The Bandwagon UVA Basketball Fans

Slam dunk 
Mustapha Farrakhan
Nation of Islam

Sportscenter Top Play
Sean Singletary 
Buzzer beater all day

Partners in crime
J.R. Reynolds
5th and 13th all time

Yeah they can score
Players you ain’t never heard before:

Calvin Baker
Transfer from William and Mary

Mamadi Diane
No not Diakite 
A disappointment you could say 

Assane Sene
7 foot tall

Tony Bennett 
Academics over bball

Apply some ointment
For that burn
Because today you’re going to learn

Skipped art class 
And got suspended 
Wasted talent

And there you have it
Before the ACC championships, recognition, and banners
These are the players who took one for the team and lived in anonymity without the glamour 

Monday, April 17, 2017

My First Day of Unemployment

I struggled to get out of my bed as normal even though it wasn't for work. As a result, I didn't get to eat a proper breakfast (you'll see why this is important later) as I rushed to leave my house in time to get to the Hirshhorn museum in time for my 10:00 entry into the Yayoi Kusama Infinite Mirrors exhibit. As I was running to make it to the museum before 9:45 aka the latest I was supposed to arrive according to my ticket (people definitely showed up after 9:45 though and it wasn't a big deal), I immediately regretted choosing such an early entry time.

It's amazing how long the line was for a same-day walk-up timed pass.

Because we were the first entry group of the day (which I didn't consciously realize when I signed up for a ticket), the lines for the five mirror rooms were super short, so I definitely recommend getting a 10:00 a.m. ticket (definitely don't regret choosing such an early entry time now). Staff members recommended seeing the mirror rooms first before viewing the other collections, but some people were not smart and did not listen lol.

The first mirror room: I didn't realize that these rooms were tiny and only fit 2-3 people at a time. I thought they were actual house-sized rooms even though I've been to the Hirshhorn before, and this wouldn't make any logical sense at all. The mirrors make the room appear a lot bigger than they are in photographs, which is the artist's intent duh lol This image is actually a screenshot of a video I took inside the room. You only get 20-30 seconds in each room, which is definitely not enough time to appreciate the work in addition to recording the moment.

The second room: This is also from a screenshot of a video I took. The selfie I took was blurry and obscured by two strangers-the disadvantage of being single-having to experience the exhibit with strangers. Clearly, I haven't gotten the hang of taking a good picture in 30 seconds. I think this picture is fitting though because of the cell phone smack dab in the middle: taking a picture of the exhibit and sharing it is part of the experience. There's an excellent New York Times article about this.

The third room: I got to enter this room alone because there wasn't a line-hence, better quality pictures.

This wasn't in the room but was one of the two peep holes in the exhibit. 

The fourth room: This is when I realized the staff has to repeat the viewing instructions for every group who enters. Imagine saying the same thing over and over again every 30 seconds for eight hours. I have mad respect for the Hirshhorn museum employees. I auto-enhanced almost all of these pictures on iPhoto, but the changes are most pronounced in this photo, which is why I've chosen to post the original picture. 

The fifth and final room: I think I was the only person in line for this room, and again, I got to enter alone, so I had so much time in here that I even struck up a conversation with the staff member who accompanied me inside the room. The topic of conversation: how someone broke one of the pumpkins and hence why visitors can't be trusted alone in this room. 

It's so much easier taking pictures when no one else is in the room. Being single is definitely an advantage when going to crowded/over populated places-once the lines got longer, staffers were asking if there were any singles to join a group or another single ahead in line. I think this advantage beats having to experience the exhibit with strangers. My metro wait was longer than any wait I had to do inside the Hirshhorn. I did have to pay $21 for parking though because it was a weekday. It would have been more economically efficient to Uber-note taken for next time.

The description does not align with the piece of work, but this is Kusama's "Notice of Approval of VISA petition..." I think this was pretty important given Trump's recent attempts at banning immigration. It's also pretty cool to see people lining up by the hundreds to see an Asian woman's work.

Last but not least, The Obliteration Room: you can't renter the exhibit once you enter this room. 

No one ever shares the art description, but I think it's important to look at a piece of art beyond its face value especially when it's already there and you don't have to figure it out for yourself, which I think is dumb by the way. 

Overall, I loved this exhibit and the messages behind each of her pieces."Anatomic explosions [truly are] are better than atomic explosions." 

And oh, I got a headache because I didn't eat enough. I'll write more about my day in another post/Youtube video.